Posts

A Rough Stretch

 It has been a while.  At one point I thought we were losing Dad. Mom will frequently say that Dad will not be her much longer after a visit. Thise are the bad days, we visit and Dad is non-reactive and sleeps for the entire visit. I went in alone and found him wrapped in a weighted blanket in his bed and his breathing was sporadic and he would pause. I left because I did not want to watch him die. The next day he was wide awake and talkative, my daughter and her husband joined me for a visit and dad offered us drinks and was smiling and laughing. I guess that is the hardest part of what is going on. You never know what to expect when you go for a visit. I have talked to the staff on the floor and they suggested afternoon visits. Dad struggles sleeping through the night so in the morning he sleeps. It actually was a great suggestion. I am really impressed with the staff at Dad's home.  They are always willing to discuss what is happening and share what is happening with D...

It Only Gets Worse

 Just came back from visiting my Dad. Absolutely no interaction. Things have been going downhill and it only seems to be accelerating.  Dad had started to get aggressive toward staff and kept trying to get out of his wheelchair. He has been wheelchair bound almost since he got placed in the home. The last few visits have been hit and miss with Dad - he had been sent to the hospital with possible UTI's 4 times in the last three months. He was aggressive and very dozy and always seemed to be twitching. One time actually ended as an ambulance pulled up to take him to the hospital.  That visit I called to see how Dad was doing and I was told he was being treated for an UTI and was on IV antibiotic for 5 days.  Three days into his stay at the hospital I called to see what was happening with visiting hours - they had changed and my mother and I were able to attend as long as we had three doses of vaccine and would wear masks.  We planned on visiting the next day - how...

Changes All Around

 It has been a while since I last posted. It has been a busy time! Mom has decided to move into a retirement home and this has happened. She has been there for over two weeks and seems to have settled in. The staff have all been very supportive and are very friendly. It was a difficult decision and has left us with a lot to do. We sold the family car - both my parents no longer had a license to drive so the car just sat in their driveway. It is one of many changes that have come about because of dad's diagnosis. It al is happening too fast. Dad moved on December 9. Mom moved April 27. The past two weeks were spent preparing for a house sale where we got rid of a number of items from my parents home. The Restore Remove program came in on Thursday and cleaned up what remained in the home. This program may have saved my sanity. Every time I drove by my parent's home I would think of what lay ahead. There was so much to do.  Wednesday we meet with the real estate agent and the hou...

Alzheimer's Awareness Month

 Hello! On this final day of Alzheimer's awareness month, I thought I would make a brief post. It has been a rough seven plus weeks since we placed Dad. Mom continues to tell everyone that I pushed for the placement as well as letting them know I am attempting to push her out of her home.  Dad has faced three rounds of isolation and made it through all three, with the last one being the easiest of all. IT has been interesting visiting Dad, as I am never sure who I am going to see. It is easiest when my youngest daughter visits with me as Dad lights up and smiles the entire time. He seems to get upset when mom is with me.  Mom and I visited yesterday and Dad wanted to talk about directions and what was going on in the halls of his home. I think it frustrated mom as she did not understand why this topic was of interest when we were there. I have tried to explain that we need to go with the flow when we visit and let Dad lead the conversation even if we do not understand the...

Placement!

It has been a while since I last posted. I have been meaning to but things got really busy. I am not just talking about Christmas holidays and lockdowns! I was helping mom with her groceries on a Friday morning in early December when the first call came. The LTC placement manager in our region knew that my parents were wavering on placement so we got a call to let us know that a phone call was coming. I was told we were going to be offered a placement at the home that was on the bottom of my mother's choice list. The call came the following Monday morning. We have been prepared and told what the procedure would be - an offer of a bed, three days to make a decision and then 5 to 7 days to prepare for the move. With COVID things had changed. We were given 24 hours to make a decision and then t move had to occur the following day. So, we had until Tuesday afternoon to make a decision and the move was to occur on Wednesday. The decision was simple. In our area there is a lengthy waitin...

It Only Gets harder....

 Good morning.... Just came back from helping my parents put up their artificial tree.  That was the easy part -  it seems every time I stop by their home (which seems to be daily) things seem to just slide down a steeper slope. At first it is difficult to see the changes that are taking place, they seem to be so gradual. Eventually you reach a point where the changes seem to slap you in the face to make sure that you realize how bad things are getting. Today was one of those days. Dad loves to watch sports on TV, baseball in the summer and hockey in the winter. He was able to navigate his television with no problems and would often be able to tell anyone when a game was on... even if I did not think their was a game! Eventually this began to change. Dad could no longer find games on television. He was not sure which channels the games would be on, even which channels would be showing a game. I made them a list of the sports channels theat are available on their TV and mo...

Time To Sit and Vent...

 This disease is awful. My father is going down a slippery slope and he is pulling my mother along behind him.  She is one year younger than he is and her health is starting to fail. A lot of it is because of the stress that watching and helping my father. It hurts to wake up every morning and not being sure what I am going to see when I stop by to visit. I talk to  mom every night to see how things went and I keep a log of what is happening. I am lucky that they only live a few blocks away! I have found an Alzheimer's/Dementia page on Facebook and have started following. IT is so difficult to read because it is World Wide and nobody  knows what advice to give because they are not sure of what supports are available in any one part of the world. So many people are struggling watching their loved on (LO) suffer. I want to say we are lucky as we do not see many of the behaviors that others have to deal with. We are not lucky because we are watching my dad no longer be ...