Placement!

It has been a while since I last posted. I have been meaning to but things got really busy. I am not just talking about Christmas holidays and lockdowns!

I was helping mom with her groceries on a Friday morning in early December when the first call came. The LTC placement manager in our region knew that my parents were wavering on placement so we got a call to let us know that a phone call was coming. I was told we were going to be offered a placement at the home that was on the bottom of my mother's choice list.

The call came the following Monday morning. We have been prepared and told what the procedure would be - an offer of a bed, three days to make a decision and then 5 to 7 days to prepare for the move. With COVID things had changed. We were given 24 hours to make a decision and then t move had to occur the following day. So, we had until Tuesday afternoon to make a decision and the move was to occur on Wednesday. The decision was simple. In our area there is a lengthy waiting list for placement. If you refuse a placement you move to the bottom of the list and have another three to five years to wait for an offer, unless something terribly awful happens. We contacted Dad's new home and were given until Thursday to move him in. We accepted the placement and made the move.

Dad was medicated to make the transition easier. I took him to the home and he was placed in lockdown until his COVID test results came back. I will not say things went well  - they did not. I stopped to visit the next day and the effects of the medication had not worn off. Dad was sitting in a wheelchair and it looked like he had lost much of his control. He said very little - I left wondering if this was the new normal.

Friday morning let me know that the new normal was going to be a rough ride. Dad had become aggressive toward staff and had to be sedated for their safety as well as his own. I was asked to bring in some photos and music that he enjoyed that may help relax him. I did and stopped by his isolation room for  a visit. He was very angry and became aggressive. He wanted to know why he was still at this place and when he would be taken home. He called me names and told me to get out. I respected his wishes and left. I decided to stay away for a few days to let him settle into his new setting. 

The next visit took place in dad's room. There was less anger but tears. I had only seen dad cry once before and was caught off guard. We talked and he did not understand why he had been placed. I tried to explain that mom was no longer able to look after him at home and it was for the best if he was there to get the care he needed.

The struggle continues. With COVID, Dad has been put in lockdown two addition times. This has been the toughest part on Dad. It has not allowed him to socialize with the other residents and staff  and it is not helping him to feel comfortable with his new setting. 

I will try to keep things up to date...